boo

happy birthday mercedes

hilarious myspace comment from shankar:

10/26/2006 8:59 PM

Megan, do you remember the all-nighter that created this:

"...Clearly our analysis is fraught with problems. One thing that we discovered after working through these regressions is that it would have been difficult to choose a more problematic dependent variable. Data on the expectations of an atomic war was only taken in 1984, which excluded the use of most potentially relevant regressors...Furthermore, this dependent variable is not scalar and hence without logit cannot be used in this kind of analysis...Our theoretical and actual analyses were forced to evolve and adapt in many ways throughout the painful process of this experiment..."

"...We concluded that if nothing else several control variables varied strongly with our dependent variable. Our controls were sex, religious identification, and race, all of which had positive correlation coefficients. This leads us to the conclusion that expectations of atomic warfare are most common among males, religious persons, and possibly whites...

For a good time see appendix."

Miss ya,

Shankar

_____

additionally, and most importantly, I FOUND A GRAMMATICAL ERROR IN A WILLIAM SAFIRE ON LANGUAGE COLUMN, AND I AM NOT JOKING.

In all IM (initialese for "instant messaging," a phrase that speed-writers apparently find too time-consuming to spell out or have already forgotten what it stands for) as well as in much email, banality is dressed in seven-league boots and triviality is treated with urgency.

all about me

hi friends.

today was a strange day, we were out till 1am at omalleys of course and i woke up at 6:30 with cramps and a bit of a hangover, actually from wine instead of beer- i didn't drink at omalleys! but i got totally sloshed at rebecca's wine presentation at dork club!

then i couldn't sleep, what with the pain all over, so i got up and took a bath and felt sorry for myself and then i got out of the bath and opened the bathroom door and bill was there (spent the night after dorkclub) and he was holding my phone, which had been ringing, apparently underneath him on the couch, and it was my boss.

and i said, hi keren, and she said, are you going to the meeting today, and i was like wha? and she said get here as soon as you can so that you can go to this meeting with me, which i hadn't been planning on going to.

random picture to break up my narrative:













so then i was bummed because i felt like ass and didn't have time to eat or grab lunch food or dress well or anything, and i rushed around and biked to work (! second time biking to work since accident, first time was yesterday) and got here sweaty and gross and rushed off to this meeting with my boss (who is crazy) and-

she's the worst driver of all time!! and i am not joking!!!

it was like this:












and then she was swearing like crazy at all these other perfectly reasonable cars. but in any case, we had these mapquest directions that patience had printed out for us, and we were running late. and at one point we realized we were headed downtown, rather than hillsboro, where we were supposed to be going, because the mapquest directions were to PACIFIC UNIVERSITY COLLEGE, which apparently exists, rather than PACIFIC UNIVERSITY. then a number of stupid things happened, such as me admitting that i'd brought literally nothing with me, including useful things such as wallets, pens and papers, and phones. she also did not have her phone. and at this point we were so so late. and then we drove every which stupid direction and at this point we were 45 minutes late, no joke, and i started having this problem where i would burst out laughing or almost burst out laughing, like constantly, while my boss was actually in a terrible mood and not thinking anything was funny. but i was all sleep deprived and i don't know- laughy. but anyway we got to this meeting over an hour late. and then that made us an hour late to the meeting we had right after that, for which i successfully parked keren's very nice car in a parking garage, bumping into no parked cars on the way. also i forgot tampons today and have been using "alternative methods" which have proven unreliable and ineffective (grossish).

also pretty much since we've gotten back to the office, i have done literally nothing. useful.

though i would like you all at this time to revisit the website, which i think i have improved.

i haven't had

hmmm.. i wrote those three words and then poppy came to talk to me about something and then now that i'm looking back at the screen i have no idea what i had planned to not have had.

here is a sentence with the word 'flower' in it.

leave me a comment, so i know that you care.

today i have cramps

ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow also comes with gas and generally bad other elements.

Beauty of Reciprocity

We’ve all heard from the time we are children” The Golden Rule “ Treat those as you want to be treated”, Do unto others as you would have others do unto you” (Jesus). “What is hateful to you, do not to your fellow man( Hille)” and last but not least “ What you want others to do to you, do not do to others (Confucius).”
Almost every religion , culture has this moral guideline, but do we follow it? If we believe it then why do we often fail, do we forget what you throw out is what you get at some point in time? Is there truth to this?
As we think back to our past circumstance and situations at some point in time we say “ ah hau, karma has came back to get me”! Situations arise whether it be in the workplace, loved ones, friends we often treat and talk to them in a way that we never wanted to be treated. Forgetting that what we throw out is what we get in return.
How much effort would it take to not say those hurtful and often unnecessary words. When it happens to us we often feel outraged and overcome with anger and animosity how could person do or say such a thing often forgetting that we at one time have done it to someone else and my even continue doing it.
As Martin Luther King once stated “ The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.” During these difficult and complicated times in our lives where we forget the “ Golden Rule”? We can not always control what we think but we can control what we say and how we react to situations. By changing our thinking its easier for us to change our behavior. [editor's note: wha?]
British comedian, Harry Thompson said, “Be kind. Remember that everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle”. Or the Ju Ju will come to bite you!












Website of the Month
www.HealthUpdates.com/h0306
For the scoop on how the right kinds of foods can help sharpen the your mind, protect you heart and vision, and cut your cancer risk and many other health updates that can help strengthen you health and well- being visit this website. Did you know that cranberry juice as well as dried cranberries can help prevent urinary tract infections. Cranberries can help reduce bacteria's ability to stick and colonize the urinary tract potentially aiding in the prevention of bladder infections.

i don't like any of these shirts

my brilliant work

2:38 pm
aha! the new jfr website is up and running, thanks to me. the whole website was done by me, entirely, except i had nothing to do with the curvey font choice, that's not my fault. it's our "look." anyway. i think the site still looks a little campy but oh well, i'm not much of a graphic designer. photo tour to come.

hacked

alarming thing. also i feel dumb/greasy/badly dressed today. and i have to go to a meeting with a bunch of strange aging experts, to represent JFR. disastrous.




he's running against tom feeney for congress! it's crazy.

gootube.

this is so weird. this is a youtube member's response to the news that google bought out youtube. this member's name is: thegermanman.

the knickers

some pictures from friday's show:






























































and the crowd goes wild

Adapting to Life's Curveballs

"We often think to ourselves life should go the way we want it. When challenges arise, why me I didn't do anything wrong! “ Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans. Life just doesn't happen without our participation,” Poet Thomas La Mance states. Do our choices and decisions outweigh random misfortunes? Are there moments that we chose to ignore and fail to take?
When we feel our security is threatened, danger is present such as financial security, our personal well being and family and health problems it may seem hard to think about what we should do next. Its hard for many of us to realize that we don't have control. We begin to feel overburden with anxieties and parts of us want to give up, do we give up, and say that’s it I am done? Do we stay in that moment of hopelessness and throw ourselves a pity party and never leave? No! Discouragement destroys hope.
Sometimes we forget all of our former victories and how we overcame them. We should start to shed all of the negative thinking, it is not helpful. Our attitudes manifest themselves in our behaviors. For example if we think we are failures then we will fail, simple as that!
Our futures have not been shattered maybe our path that we were taking in life is geared to something better direction. Maybe we failed to listen to that little voice in our head and we will not make better decisions.
Think about the lessons along the way, what did we learn about ourselves? Maybe we learn that we are much stronger than we think. We are a resilient people and there is always something to learn along the way."

I am I So Thankful Month
"This month is dedicated to giving thanks and counting your blessings daily. When life has us down and we are struggling to adapt to the curve balls of what the world is throwing at us we forget to be thankful for what we do have. Many around the world are lacking the basics that we take for granted such as running water, toilets and electricity. Something that may help us keep a perspective on our own trial is to think about those who do with out. Many children and adults have lost their dignity and mobility, but the new design of dramatically reduced cost wheel chair thousands of lives are changing.
More than 100 million disabled poor people of the world must drag themselves along the ground or be carried. Their disability can trap them in a life of deep poverty and humiliation. Wheel chairs are not an option because they cost hundreds of dollars and most cannot afford it. Recently Free Wheelchair Mission and other partnerships began collecting donated wheel chairs and parts to create a unique lightweight wheel chair to give mobility to thousands around the world. The goal is to serve 16,000 or more people. One of the key engineers began to design wheel chairs because of the impact that was made by seeing a Moroccan woman crawl across a dirt road. He decided to design the least expensive wheel chair as possible and get it to as many people as possible. The chair has very few parts and is based on a normal plastic patio chair that is durable, washable and inexpensive. It can be used for adults and children by adjustment and adding a harness."


[sic].

actually

there is something to talk about now, which is that poppy just came into my office to ask me to close my door so she can't hear "wait wait don't tell me" from her desk... and she did it in the nicest way. like, really nice. and i'm supposed to go to lunch with she and patience later this week. and i guess the point is, whenever you're sure of something, assume that you're wrong, for the rest of your life.

OH. MY. GOD.

boy, have i got news for you guys!!!!


the craziest thing happened.
i got to work
and would you believe it...
i did some work
and bit my nails
and


and


i have nothing to blog about.
ok, i cried listening to "this american life" today. it was about unconditional love. i cried kind of too much to be crying at work, like tears streaming kind of a thing. thankfully, my job, as you know, is a lonely and desolate one.
soooo....
here is a picture of my job:












and of tears...:



and now i'm listening to










and it's still not that funny.



so.


If you're blue and you don't know where to go to why don't you go where fashion sits
Puttin' on the Ritz
Different types who wear a day coat pants with stripes and cutaway coat perfect fits
Puttin' on the Ritz
Dressed up like a million-dollar trooper
Tryin' hard to look like Gary Cooper (super duper)


Come let's mix where Rockefellers walk with sticks or um-ber-ellas in their mitts

lunch

lunch today:

















lunch yesterday:

birthday, etc

there will hopefully be pictures eventually to post, if i can finnagle (sp?) them out of bon's camera. the depends party was a smashing success, everyone attended and good sports were to be found around every corner.

i must divulge an embarrassing fact- which i only feel comfortable doing here due to the utterly private nature of the blogosphere- which is that i had a small absorbency problem early in the night, and a rather large absorbency problem later on in the night. and i was the only person to have this kind of problem. and those were the only two times i successfully peed into the correct side of the diaper. and that is all i will say about that.

here is a picture of a diaper that looks pretty similar to what we wore:















and here is a picture of an adult in a diaper:










but the reason i felt like posting just now was really that i was doing some more of this data entry from surveys of nicaraguan elders that i've been doing, which are all very depressing, and someone had written "desuelo" under "do you have any other problems you would like to report?"

and i looked it up, and the literal translation of "desuelo" is:
"i desolate."

and when those words popped up in the google translator, it was sad in a way i can't explain.

i'm sad

8:00am
that i seem to do best on about 10 hours of sleep, like mercedes. which would involve going to bed every night before 10 pm, ha!



















7:00pm
i was looking at this website that shows places with wireless in portland, and allows you to make comments. one person said the following about mojo's coffee den:

Wow! Great Coffee!Posted by isabella r. at 16: 0PM -0 5-, 2005

I LOVE Mojo's coffee, me it remembers to the coffee at the cafe in hometown of mine San Gimignano in Italy (South from Florence). Such charming conversation the older man has behind the counter. My computer running so fast with internet. I have now not had opportunity to attend poetry but I like to soon. In my country we also hate your president George Bush, Mojos is just like my home.

a hoot.

found a funny joke online:

A nun goes to the doctor with an attack of hipo that already lasts a month to him.
- Doctor, I have been having an attack of hipo, for a month, that does not let to me live. I do not sleep, not like, already hurts the body to me of as much involuntary compulsive movement.
- Tiéndase in the stretcher, sister, who I am going to examine says it the doctor.

It examines it and it says to him:
- Sister, you this pregnant woman!

The nun rises and leaves running the consultation with panic face. One hour later the doctor receives a call of the superiora mother of the convent:
- Doctor, what has said You to him to the sister Maria?
- Superiora mother Will see, as she had a fort attacks of hipo, I gave a scare him so that she took off to him and I suppose that will have taken off to him, no? , the doctor says.
- Yes, to the sister Maria hipo has taken off him, but the father Juan has thrown itself of the bell tower.

hoot! hoot! that's a hoot.

actually, wait, i was putting it up because it's a google "translate this page" creation and it sounds funny. of course my favorite part is, "Sister, you this pregnant woman!"
but i just got the joke. ha.
also, i just lost the game. and if you read this later you lose too. oh. except you eastcoasters don't know about the game? or do you? can't quite remember. let me know, i'll clue you in if you don't and you'll be so.... grateful.

oh god no

aerry is a very nice woman at work whose boyfriend is in a very, very bad band.

they are called 'unpopular club.'

their highlighted song is 'justin case'

and their album cover looks like this:










and aerry sent me their music because i told her i was in a band, and she said, "tell me what you think!"

what to say? what to say?

"i hate them."

"the fall"

so this looks similar to my x-ray, except that in mine the broken off part is more underneath the main part. also the main part is longer and the broken off part shorter.






this is a baby that broke his/her clavicle too!













this is someone's drawing of my broken clavicle.

and this is someone's drawing of my shoulder separation (my theory is that my shoulder has "unseparated" now because the pain lessened so much, so dramatically, and also because my shoulder stopped looking so grossly sunken.)


this is the weirdest of all. i didn't see anyone around at the time (not surprising, since i was flying through the air at break-clavicle speed) but someone was there and they got a picture of my fall.

news from clackamas

8: 30 am. poppy, who is suddenly very nice to me, sent me and four other ladies (cruelly omitting stacy, who is still her enemy) this link

1:15 pm. incredibly irritable. no particular cause detected. i wish there were people around so i could snap at them. no, not really.

1:17 pm. i just realized i'm premenstrual. hilarious. feeling relieved.








1:22 pm. image searched "premenstrual" on google and i was going to post the first image that came up, but it was kind of alarming (as were several others). so i chose this one:



















3:10 pm. poppy sent another email to me and some ladies with the following image plus about 25 more. i was going to upload several but it takes a million years, and you know... i'm at work. i don't do that kind of thing.










at the end of the email, confusingly, poppy wrote:

AND REMEMBER:

Good friends are like stars.
You don't always see them, but you always know they are there.

that's true.